I got the best gift this year. No, no, I didn’t go searching through the closets looking for whatever someone might have stashed away for me. I am horrible at delay of gratification, but even I’m not that bad. (That trait would belong to my sister.)
No, one of my closest friends said (editorial paraphrasing here), “Hey. Bring the kids over at 11am, come back after you and Bald Man (no, she doesn’t call him Bald Man, but that way you know who I’m talking about) have gone out for dinner.” Really? Seriously? All THREE kids? For the WHOLE day? Way cool. Especially since she has three herself! Crazy lady. But hey, I answered “yes” before she had a chance to realize what she offered and backed out of it. (No, she wouldn’t do that.)
C’mon, now, is that an awesome gift or what? Time! She found a way to give the gift of time! And I loved it. I am an introvert, and there’s not much opportunity to cater to that facet of my personality when I’m home with kids all day. So one of the best parts of my day was sitting at a restaurant eating lunch with only a book as my dining companion. Wonderful.
Bald Man and I did have a nice evening out at a wine tasting (our first, very fun) and then coffee and dessert at a great local restaurant, Coco’s Bistro. Yum.
It’s good to have friends who you know will take care of your kids. Friends who inspire the type of trust that allows you the freedom to enjoy an evening and to not worry about your children though they are not with you. To whom you can count on to model good behaviour, kindness, and love. I thought these were such friends. I really did. And then we arrived to pick up our dear little ones, and found I’d been betrayed.
You see, I am a fan of the Big Ten schools in general, and of the Fighting Illini in particular. I do, however, have a great dislike for a certain Big Ten school (you can tell how much I dislike it by my refusal to link to it), and particularly for its athletic program. Unfortunately for me, I also happen to live in the state in which this school is located. And, due to that fact, a great many of my friends, most of whom have been born and bred here (hey, they did all breed here, weird) are great devotees to this particular school. And they like to taunt me. Can you imagine?
Well, the taunting I can handle. I’m strong. This latest stunt, though, has just about tested my limits. Along with teaching my oldest her square roots (which, by the way, was cool), our dear friend (the husband of the duo) taught my dear, impressionable, innocent children the slanderous chant of the wicked team. And of ALL of the things that I try to teach them each day that they can’t seem to keep in their tiny brains for more than 2 seconds, for some reason this little chant has managed to stick around. For days. And days.
So, yes, my little darlings are taunting me all day. In my kitchen, in my car, in my bedroom, my darlings are badgering me with, “O-H” and the reply, and the “Go Buc*****!” Grrrr.
So, yeah, I’ve got the kids in detox now. I only chant with them if they’re chanting, “I-L-L” “I-N-I”. I went so far as to tell my youngest when he was using the “b” word that what he was saying was naughty (which, funnily enough, my IL friend Jackie did as well without me having told her that). I think Bald Man thought that was going a little too far. But he’s finishing the OH cheers with them, so he’s on my list, too.
Anyway, remember friend, revenge is SWEET. I see a lot of orange and blue coming your way. 
And, in all seriousness, thanks for the great gift of a day out. Despite the brainwashing, it was a very special gift. And thanks for the, “I’m blogging this.” t-shirts. Whaddya know, you were right? 
I didn’t know you don’t like Ohio! How could you not like Ohio!? You’re supposed to hate Michigan! Hating Michigan is equivalent to hating the Red Wings and the Dallas Cowboys. They are all the worst of the worst.
OH! How could I forget how much I hate the Yankees! They’re just as bad as the Wolverines, Red Wings and Cowboys. Hating Ohio State is like hating chocolate chip cookies, McDonalds french fries and the Pittsburgh Steelers! How Could You!? : )
ok, i will claim christmas rush as the reason i have not had time to check blogs in a week or so (plus the 3 referred to children in the post who happen to keep me busy!) anyway i need to rest a little before i can offer this gift again (all children were great but the sheer number was a little on the exhausting side) BUT obviously we will need to do this VERY OFTEN in order to keep the O-H-I-O chant ingrained. don’t worry- its the same as if you happen to ever accidentally use a word in front of your children that belongs in *&^% - they can miss every other instruction given that day but will remember the “less than polite” word forever!! (spoken from experience) so YES your children will be chanting for the OSU BUCKEYES (SOON TO BE NATIONAL CHAMPIONS) FOREVER… and plenty of time with a certain family (us!) will help that!
glad you had a good day!!!!
Doug: How can I not like Ohio? Really, it’s quite easy. And I like the Cowboys, too. And please don’t lump the yummy purity of chocolate chip cookies with the yucky bucks.
Yeah, I still don’t know how you survived that day! Whew. You are Superwoman! Thanks for my awesome day.
:D 
Heidi: You mean you don’t run home every day and immediately check to see what wisdom I’ve imparted in the blogosphere? For shame.
And, as for the rest, all I have to say is, “I-L-L-I-N-I!!!!!!”
Kerri,
I’m really sorry to hear about this incident. I don’t know what it was that made you think your children could be safe with a bucknut watching them. Funny though, I thought maybe it was Jeff who had done this to your poor children. I know when I finally get around to having children, I’m going to have to watch him (They will be a boys!) carefully around all those who are not smart enough to root for the Wolverines. I have already had the talk with my father-in-law (An OH– grad) about what colors my children will be allowed to wear.
Rantz: I have a fellow resident holdback?! Solidarity! No, it wasn’t Jeff. You think I’d trust him with my kids? ha. Just kidding. It was the other king of the local chapter of those who must not be named who caused this near-irreparable destruction. Yeah, I mostly root for the Wolverines in homage to my dad, and because the bucksters hate it.
But my heart belongs to the Fighting Illini, who are never a threat to your dear Wolverines, so you can root with me.
No lie, just as I was hitting the “submit comment” button, my three year old comes in absentmindedly chanting, “O-H-I-*”. Man, I did not realize the extent of the brainwashing. Grr….
Do the Illini have a football team? I just looked at my Michigan widget (Love my widgets!)and I don’t see them on the schedule. I know we don’t play all the teams in the confrence, but I can’t remember them at all. Are they Wrong State-ish?
The problem is that it’s so easy to spell. 4 letters. Most of their fans hesitate to spell anything over that (I shouldn’t talk as spelling is my worst subject). Just teach him to spell Mississippi. It’s fun to spell and catchy. Or B-double e-double r-un. It’s a good one to sing. Mrs. Grotto will most likely tell you that a good tune will help you learn just about anything.
Rantz: Do the Fighting Illini have a football team? I’m crushed. I thought you were my friend.
Yes, the Fighting Illini of the University of Illinois most definitely do have a team (one that I have seen play in person so many years ago), though not much of one to speak of for many eons. That’s okay, basketball’s on now.
I knew they have a basketball team. Does that help? There are just so many schools who have basketball and don’t have football, or maybe we just hear more about teams during basketball season or something…
I am late to comment, but oh well. We do have a football team that has been showing improvement and has some very highly ranked recruits coming in to help out Juice. And basketball is here, and we all know that we have that going for us. And i will make sure that the next time I visit, you offer to watch the Landes children and I will help them to see the light.:)
Jackie: You’re not supposed to ANNOUNCE our master plan out here for all the world to see!